Life

Yeah I might be defeated
and I might hang my head
I might be barely breathing, but I'm not dead
No,
'Cause tomorrow's another day
and I'm thirsty anyway
So bring on the rain- JoDee Mecina

Just when you think nothing good will happen in your life, it does. Just when you think nothing bad could happen it does. I had both in a day's time.

My boss at my part time job shared his goal with me, and told me that he wants me to be a part of his business venture. I was flabbergasted, thrilled, and flattered all at the same time. He and my other co-workers, and the entire facility, really, have been a blessing to me. I love working there and find that I am a different person- a better person- when I am there. The atmosphere is more positive. The passion the employees have for their work is evident. No one's slogging through their day wishing it were over. They are there to make a difference, to serve the Lord, and it is good work.

The only caveat to this potential opportunity is that's all it is- potential. He wants to make it happen, he's just not sure when it will happen but he knows he wants me along for the ride. And I want to be there. So now we're both praying for guidance, discussing things with our respective spouses, and waiting to see what happens next. It is exciting and irritating at the same time.

It's almost like the bad times circle round
A couple drops and they all start falling down

A co-worker and dear friend had been experiencing bad headaches for several months. I've known her about a year and a half and she's had them at least that long if not longer. Last fall she got pregnant unexpectedly and got married on the sly. She came back, announced her marriage and pregnancy to the rest of her co-workers and life went on. She had terrible morning sickness that never passed- she was sick the entire pregnancy until her doctor finally told her to stop working and stay home. She did, and in March she delivered a beatiful, healthy baby girl.

Monday night thisdear friend had a brain aneursym- she had 2 but only one let loose (I don't know the proper term, forgive me). I found out via email Tuesday and was immediately devastated. Thankfully, wonderfully, she survived a 9hr surgery on Tuesday afternoon and came out of a come on her own yesterday, flailing and struggling to remove the breathing tube. I'm fairly certain she was also swinging and swearing which are two reasons I adore her. She's talking, knows faces, names and relationships and can do almost any task she's given. She remembers me even though we haven't talked for several weeks and don't see each other on a regular basis. But she thinks she's just delivered her daughter and is still in the hospital recovering from the birth. She doesn't realize she was out for 2 days and the baby is 5 weeks old. She doesn't realize she is in a downtown Chicago hospital and keeps using her OBGYN's name when referring to her current doctors.

She went through so much with the headaches and the pregnancy that I just couldn't believe she'd been dealt another crappy hand. Times like this really put things into perspective. I was emotionally drained Tuesday and had to ream my son out over his failing math grade. I just didn't want any more upheaval but I had to deal with it.

Life is too short. I don't want to miss out on the things I really want to do because I may not be around long enough to get them all done. I don't want to piss away my life at a job I hate. I don't want to commit to activities and outings that bring joy instead of dread. I don't want to put off dates with my mom, sister or friends because I'm 'too busy'. Pretty soon I'll 'too busy' myself right out of their lives and have no one around. Too often I feel like I'm being pulled in a million directions, and none of them are the way I want to go. It is time to take a stand and to take charge of my life, in a manner of speaking, so that I don't spend my last years saying 'what if'.

Call your mom. Hug your kids. Pet the dog. They'll be gone before you know it.
j